Fleeting Feelings

Shall we sail through the corners
Of my mind?
Lost in time —
Thoughts I dare you
To find —
Up there
Amidst cool air
Without a care
Just me
And you
Sailing through
The corners of

My mind —

– head full of you

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All or Nothing

What is it that you want?
Is it a companion?
His thoughts or her presence?
The warmth of his body
Or the weight of her essence?
To feel the callouses in his hands
Or the way you feel as she moves you to dance?
My foolishness in love spells naive
As I sit here alone on New Years Eve.

Roots

Please pardon,
These roots that run
Through the garden,
Of our home.

Two children
Pretending —
We’d struck gold
As we hold
Onto these roots
that run
the weight
of home.
Beneath my hands
Ran the rush
Of feelings never told.

These feelings that we’ve buried
Deep inside,
Chosen to hide —
Not by will,
But by way,
The ways of this house
That we’ve grown to hold
But you see —
Part of growing old
Is learning to unlearn
These stories we’ve been told.

Now that we’re older,
Can you still recall?
The tall branches brushing in its sway,
Lit by the lingering light of day,
How our fingers felt the earth and found
These roots —
That run the weight of this home.

A visceral clarity
Sincerity
Two children
In a garden
Forever etched in my
memory.

– to my brother

A Silent Kind Of Love

Do you know
what it takes
to be a father?
Detached from the child from birth;
As if it’d landed on earth;
From another universe;
Not for you to hold,
But nevertheless you told — yourself
As you watched her sleep
In your arms of despair,
Watched her little lungs
Ventilate the air,
That surrounds you,
And wraps their arms around you,
And forces you to breathe —
To seize —
Every moment,
Till you’re down on your knees —
Your life, no longer yours alone, to own;
Your world and her world
Somehow intertwined,
Yet, you find — yourself
Lost on the roads she chose to tread,
The paths she chose instead — of
The tarmac you’d laid out for her,
The world you’d built around her;

But you see,
To me, it’s perfectly clear —
Being a father is not
The being here
But the staying here
In her heart
When she’s
free
fall-
ing
limbs
flail-
ing
in
des-
pair
wind
rush-
ing
through
her
grace-
less
hair
Noth-
ing
to hold
onto
but
a feeling —
The feeling that you’re there.

You see these shoes,
Soiled from the earth I tread,
The paths that I’ve chosen instead,
Behind me, the night is gaining ground,
So tired of staying guarded,
I lay my eyelids down —
To hear the sound,
Of waves rushing towards me,
And pulling me in,
Running its cool waters
Over the burns of my skin,
Sensing where I’ve been,
Washing away the depths of my sins.

The warmth of your current
Surrounds me;
Wraps its arms around me;
And just for a moment
I’d like to lie
Here in,
In the arms
of your
ocean.

– to my father who taught me
                 how to love

Slow dance

I fell
like a
flight-
less
bird,
hap-
less
limbs,
desp-
air,
cut-
ting
through
the
air,
wind
rush-
ing
through
my
grace-
less
hair,
I closed my eyes,
And felt my body
plummet
into
the end —
But then, I felt it,
It engulfed me,
Wrapped its waves around me,
Calming my trashing body,
I felt myself,
Sinking, sinking deep —
Into serene blue
It was you,
It was you, I felt
Moving through the current,
Suspended in a different
Kind of air,
No longer a victim
But a player,
You see
These waves lick lavishly at the burns of my skin
Sensing where I’ve been,
Invites me in — to dance
In the arms of his ocean.

Full Circle

I believe in revolutions,
Like the way
a circle
always comes
back to
one,
The way
the world
revolves
around the
sun,
The way
the waves
pull back then
rushes straight
back
in,
The way
Your touch’s
left lingering
under my
skin,
The way I
pour my
heart
into the
sea,
Believing
she will find
her way
back
to
me.

 

Roots

Please pardon,
These roots that run
Through the garden,
Of our home.

Two children
Pretending —
We’d struck gold
As we hold
Onto these roots
that run
the weight
of home.
Beneath my hands
Ran the rush
Of feelings never told.

Now that we’re older,
Can you still recall?
The tall branches, brushing in its sway,
Lit by the lingering light of day,
How our fingers felt the earth and found,
These roots —
That run the weight of this home.
A visceral clarity
Sincerity
Two children
In a garden
Forever etched in my memory.

– to my brother